As Akechi steps out the door, a voice whispers in Ren's heart. Not Lavenza; wherever she is, Ren has shut her away. It sounds almost like Ren himself. And it says,
Adjustment. Rank two.
His whole body goes cold. No, that's wrong, Akechi is his Justice arcana, and they were already at rank ten, and Ren felt the bond shatter but he could still sense the shattered bond until the moment Maruki rewrote the world, he can feel it again now—
—and at the same time, at the same time that he can touch the crumbled chains of his bond with Akechi, he can reach out and feel the new bond tucked up next to the others. Adjustment.
Hazily, like he's in a dream, he follows Akechi to the door and locks it. It's not like he hasn't thought before that Akechi is like a different person now, but he thought it was a metaphor, not—not Akechi really being a completely different—
So that means he's dead after all. Ren sold out the world to save Akechi, Ren betrayed Akechi himself to save him, and he died anyway, in exactly the manner he all but begged Ren not to allow.
Cool. Ren's fine.
He wanders back through to the living area. The kotatsu looks comfortable. The art on the walls is cheerful. Yusuke would have thought it lacked substance, before. He'd probably love it now.
Ren hasn't been alone since February 2nd—the first one, that is; if the laugh that emerges sounds a little hysterical then fucking sue him. Like Shrike said, he's been isolated but he hasn't been alone, because even when no one else is around him, Maruki is always there, always watching. Sometimes luck turns out in Ren's favor and he wonders if Maruki did it. A bribe, or a demonstration, or just—because he's trying to be kind. A benevolent dictator. Or maybe it was luck, nothing more, the coin coming down tails when he calls tails, his favorite food on sale, absolutely normal shit, and he's just losing his fucking mind thinking about how Maruki's eyes are on him. All the time. Every minute of every day, waiting for Ren to commit thought crime, apparently, or else for his sadness to surpass acceptable levels.
But he's gone, now. Ren is free of him. He knows, because he's been able to think about summoning Satanael and shooting a giant bullet that vaporizes Maruki's fucking head; and he knows because February 2nd was the last time he felt these wild, keening depths of despair.
A frantic, burning pressure builds in his chest. Tears sting the corners of his eyes—he doesn't even know what for, at this point, but who fucking cares? He takes off his glasses and throws them onto the chair. And then he sucks in a breath that sears his lungs, and, alone alone alone in his apartment that Akechi stole from a cognition, Akechi who's not Akechi at all, he screams.
no subject
Adjustment. Rank two.
His whole body goes cold. No, that's wrong, Akechi is his Justice arcana, and they were already at rank ten, and Ren felt the bond shatter but he could still sense the shattered bond until the moment Maruki rewrote the world, he can feel it again now—
—and at the same time, at the same time that he can touch the crumbled chains of his bond with Akechi, he can reach out and feel the new bond tucked up next to the others. Adjustment.
Hazily, like he's in a dream, he follows Akechi to the door and locks it. It's not like he hasn't thought before that Akechi is like a different person now, but he thought it was a metaphor, not—not Akechi really being a completely different—
So that means he's dead after all. Ren sold out the world to save Akechi, Ren betrayed Akechi himself to save him, and he died anyway, in exactly the manner he all but begged Ren not to allow.
Cool. Ren's fine.
He wanders back through to the living area. The kotatsu looks comfortable. The art on the walls is cheerful. Yusuke would have thought it lacked substance, before. He'd probably love it now.
Ren hasn't been alone since February 2nd—the first one, that is; if the laugh that emerges sounds a little hysterical then fucking sue him. Like Shrike said, he's been isolated but he hasn't been alone, because even when no one else is around him, Maruki is always there, always watching. Sometimes luck turns out in Ren's favor and he wonders if Maruki did it. A bribe, or a demonstration, or just—because he's trying to be kind. A benevolent dictator. Or maybe it was luck, nothing more, the coin coming down tails when he calls tails, his favorite food on sale, absolutely normal shit, and he's just losing his fucking mind thinking about how Maruki's eyes are on him. All the time. Every minute of every day, waiting for Ren to commit thought crime, apparently, or else for his sadness to surpass acceptable levels.
But he's gone, now. Ren is free of him. He knows, because he's been able to think about summoning Satanael and shooting a giant bullet that vaporizes Maruki's fucking head; and he knows because February 2nd was the last time he felt these wild, keening depths of despair.
A frantic, burning pressure builds in his chest. Tears sting the corners of his eyes—he doesn't even know what for, at this point, but who fucking cares? He takes off his glasses and throws them onto the chair. And then he sucks in a breath that sears his lungs, and, alone alone alone in his apartment that Akechi stole from a cognition, Akechi who's not Akechi at all, he screams.