His answering chuckle has the dry charm of a death rattle. "Truly, you don't need to reassure me—with your foot, or its absence, or anything else. I'm not the one in this house who needs protection. I just visit.

"Whatever the two of you want to get up to in private—I can only hope my imagination limits itself to the physically possible. Not to mention the inevitable TV reenactments by Gorb and Jokorb."

Have you heard of Gorb and Jokorb, by the way, Ren? Akechi hopes not.