October 4th

[vessel_ken_amada]

[CW: death]


It was a day where Ken was nowhere to be seen. Not in his room, the house, his old room, or anywhere he usually was. His phone was off, too. It may have seemed like he completely disappeared, had he not told Raven quickly before leaving that he'd be busy all day - just for the sake of not having a search party for him.

Someone going in that shady spot behind the Tatsumi Port Island station, however, would find him. He was there the whole day, just standing in the middle, not moving, seeming almost lifeless, his gaze lost in the void.

It was October 4th.

The day where she died.

The day where she was brutally murdered.

A scream. Sickly green hues. A giant monster suddenly appearing. Everything breaking apart. Rubble everywhere. She was shouting at him, pushing away, saving him. Blood. Terror.

...

...

Will someone approach him?

Comments

[minipancake]

Again, Wagtail has a harder time replying. How to sum up what he sees in Ken, without just pissing him off? "I guess I know what it's like to be lost in the dark."

[vessel_ken_amada]

"I..."

Ken looks at them, baffled. How could they say such nice things to him...?

...

"You're wrong. Don't be fooled, I'm just an empty shell. An abomination. I'm just... the end."

To make his point, he stops resisting the channeling. Power fills him, he spits a huge pool of blood on the ground, his red eye glows, and suddenly a strong feeling of Death is here, you must run, you must run starts filling the area.

[fogboundcrow]

Raven winces. The feeling. It's spilling forth, horrifying, spreading. He can feel his heart racing, his skin crawling. Alarm bells blare in his head, but still... Still!

"Stop trying to push us away!"

His Shadow whimpers. "Goro..."

cw abuse

[minipancake]

"I don't care!" Gritting his teeth, Wagtail locks on to Ken even tighter, though the knowledge of his death creeps all through him— under his fingernails, up each of his veins, settling in the core of his being. It's a lot, but he's his mother's son; he's been alone more than he's been loved; he's lived half his life with death one false move away.

"Kill me, if you're going to! Go on! I dare you! But I won't let go! You're going to have to kill me to make me give up on you, Ken."

[vessel_ken_amada]

"Don't you get it!? This isn't an attack to push you away! This is the truth! This is what" - he pronounces like the dirtiest word - "I really am! This is what is always inside me! I may try to hide it at times, but don't be fools!"

[fogboundcrow]

"No, Ken. This isn't what you are inside. These abilities don't define you as a person!" And so he clings, even with the horrible feeling pervading, tears in his eyes. "You're still you. You're still our friend!"

"Y-You mean so much to us..." his Shadow shakily adds, despite the terror welling up inside.

[minipancake]

"Right, Ken!" Okay, he's really had enough of this. If death is coming closer every second, then he screams defiance at it. "This is all you are. And I'm just the whore's bastard son from Kabukicho. Just dirty trash. Do you have any idea how much of that I heard? How much I believed it? I still believe it!"

A tear runs down his face. "You like food. You like cuddles. You like Raven. You are what you are, but it doesn't have to be all you are! You define what you are!"

[vessel_ken_amada]

The feeling suddenly stops, and Ken starts sobbing again.

It was so... overwhelming. There were people who liked some parts of him, and who cared so much they were willing to brave everything else for those tiny bits. What did he do to deserve it? Why him? Why???

[fogboundcrow]

Raven slumps over the moment the feeling goes away. For a moment, he simply catches his breath, but then he's back to hugging Ken, holding him close. His Shadow even joins in, spreading warmth along the way.

"It's all right, Ken," Raven says. "We won't abandon you."

[minipancake]

It is a relief. Wagtail grunts, catching his breath, then presses even closer than he originally was. "You're one of us, Ken, okay? No matter what secrets you've got."

[vessel_ken_amada]

Thankfully, he doesn't take nearly as much time as before to calm down as before. A few minutes, maybe, before the sobbing subsides.

He then goes limp into... into his friends' embrace, with some implicit consent to be cared for and doted upon. He is too tired to resist it, anyway.

[fogboundcrow]

With consent more or less given, Raven tentatively strokes Ken's hair, just like Magpie does for him sometimes. Just like his mother once...

Well. It is what it is. At least he can still be here for Ken.

"Do you want to go home? We could always stay with you tonight."

[minipancake]

Wagtail, meanwhile, rubs Ken's shoulder, holding him tight. "Yeah. We can come with you. You don't have to be alone."

[vessel_ken_amada]

"I..."

It's embarassing, but he's too tired to have a filter.

"Can we stay like this a little longer?" he asks in a really quiet voice.

[fogboundcrow]

"That's all right. We can move once you're ready." For now, he'll stay right where he is, holding Ken close.

[minipancake]

"Always," Wagtail agrees. He settles back against Ken, keeping him safe.

[vessel_ken_amada]

Ken has a long sigh of relief, some of the earlier tension dissipating.

"You're so amazing," he says a bit sleepily. "So amazing."

[fogboundcrow]

"So are you." It's important that Ken get reassurance. He's the one who needs it right now. "Do you want one of us to carry you back?"