personavelvetroomdr | (no subject)

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[It's a perfectly ordinary day in Tokyo, if you ignore the fact that Akechi just got done enduring a horrific, white palace with crumbling architecture, creepy tentacles everywhere, and scraps of memory locked away and scattered like puzzle pieces, culminating in battling a tentacled abomination to free Wakaba Isshiki's Shadow from the prison of her mind, and... well. A mother-daughter reunion is always nice, he supposes.

He's on the phone when he stumbles in, deep in the midst of a conversation.]

Isshiki-san's condition is stable, but we'll have to relocate her before he notices anything amiss. ...Yes, Dad, I'm all right. Not that I don't appreciate the concern, but-

[The signal cuts out, and... ah. The Velvet Room. And not the Velvet Room of his childhood, but... this one.

At first he bristles, eyes narrowed into a razor-sharp glare. He has half a mind to complain to Igor about locking him out, but all signs point to Ren's "Igor" being impostor, and... no. Wait.

Recollection flashes before him. With that recollection, he grimaces.]

...Of course I'd end up back here.

[He shuts his eyes, brings a hand to his face, and breathes in deeply. He was such a stupid tween, and if people connect him to said tween... Who even knows how much time has passed here?]

[ooc: Older version of

fogboundcrow for the funny. Some info on his profile. Yes, he's wearing a Shujin uniform.]

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...I can imagine it wasn't pleasant to deal with the aftermath, even if he did deserve it.

[Just as it was unpleasant to be so thoroughly consumed by his pent up rage, screaming and cackling and being so feral until Yu and Dojima calmed him down.

So how would the Phantom Thieves even take it? If they saw their noble, princely leader drenched in black...]

[ Akechi has no fucking idea. But the full truth of that skirts close to things Ren doesn't want to talk about.

He studies Akechi's expression. ] The Loki thing really gets to you, huh? Is it just the bad memory?

[Sudden subject change... Hm. That earns a curious quirked brow.]

Hmm... You know, if you wish to vent, you're more than welcome to. I've certainly talked your ear off.

[ Ren's eyes widen; for a split second he seems almost frozen, caught out in something. Then he smiles, so easily you could forget that just a second ago, he was terrified by the concept of venting. ]

I don't mind listening. Believe me, if I minded, I'd let you know.

It's not that I think you mind. All I'm saying is that if you had anything to get off your chest, it's only fair.

[But he shrugs. It's ultimately Ren's choice, and if he'd rather Akechi continue, that's just as well.

Somewhat. It is a bit worrying.]

[ He gives Akechi a strange, bemused smile. ]

You're a weird guy. No one's ever told me that before except my Akechi back home. [ His chest feels funny. ]

Ha. I understand that. It wasn't really until I met Kanji that I began to find people who gave a shit.

[It's relatable... and funny, to be honest.]

But the way I see it, someone has to at one point or another, or you'll be stuck in your own thoughts. And I know how maddening that is.

[ That still doesn't mean people offer, Ren almost says. That just means I'm stuck in their own thoughts. But he keeps his mouth closed on that. He misses his own Akechi so much it fills his limbs with lead. But he can't say that either, because if he does, he might not stop. First it's I miss Akechi, next it's And I have to kill him when I get home.

When he finally speaks, it's more to turn his thoughts away from explosive confessions than for any other reason. That's what he tells himself, anyway. ]

You know Kamoshida? Did he have a Palace in your world? [ Not that Ren ever went in his Palace or even met the guy, but he's heard about him. ]

Of course he did. I even had the "luxury" of being dragged into it by Morgana the same day I met my world's version of Ren.

[He wheezes out a dry little chuckle, though there's a subtle shift in his posture. A slight tension in the shoulders. A subtle curve of the spine.]

[ Ren fiddles with his chopsticks again, staring at the wall. ] The guy I stabbed was like that. But he was bright enough to think of being an orphanage director instead of just a teacher.

[And just like that, the tension only intensifies. His lip curls back into a snarl. He slowly, painfully, inhales through his nose, holding that breath for a few seconds before letting it escape.]

So that bastard was in charge of the safety of innocent children and got away with it.

[Absolutely disgusting.]

[ Ren's eyes flicker briefly back to Akechi. When he speaks, it's with a tone of grim amusement that he hasn't used yet in this Akechi's company. ]

I don't know about innocent. I stole a switchknife just so I could stab him.

...Did you steal it from another child?

[Sheesh. What kind of orphanage was that? Then again, if the 'caretaker' was that bad... Hm.]

[ He snorts. ] No. I shoplifted it.

[ What the hell kind of shop just leaves switchknives out to be shoplifted, you might wonder. Especially if it also allows twelve-year-olds entrance. Don't worry about it! It was a totally harmless shop run by totally normal people. Ren's never been stupid enough to go back, though. ]

Ha. Well, far be it from me to judge. Phantom Thief and all.

[He'd be a hypocrite in many ways if he did. Especially given the circumstances.]

Still, for what it's worth, I'm sorry you had to live through that. I'm no stranger to childhood trauma, but that's... certainly a lot.

Yeah. [ He's staring at their table now, lip curled in the hint of a snarl. ] Then he tried to sell me. But here I am.

[His fists tremble. That subtle curve of the sine's a more distinct arch now. He's glaring down at his plate.]

You're a strong person to have endured so much. I don't blame you for attacking him in the slightest. All things considered, you had every right to want him dead.

[ Akechi's not wrong, but he also wouldn't be saying that if he knew what really befell Ren's last orphanage director. He sounds upset, though; with a frown, Ren turns back to look at him. It's easier to do when they're not talking about... all of that. ]

Hey, cheer up. I'm fine, right? And he's not in business anymore.

For the record, if you aren't completely fine, that's... also fine. It can take years to unpack those sort of feelings. I had to get therapy, and I'm still not completely "over" it.

[As evident by how eager he was to just... vent about it. Haha...]

And no, the therapist wasn't Maruki.

Did he really say he doesn't have the heart to talk to Yoshizawa about her delusions? Why even be a therapist, then?

[ Yeah, Ren still hasn't forgotten that... statement. ]

Well, what he said, roughly, was that he can't force her to face a truth she isn't ready for. That, essentially, he can guide her, but as a therapist, he has to respect his clients' boundaries and be a source of encouragement and comfort just as much as a doctor.

[In short, Maruki is a bleeding heart who would rather let her live a delusion than face a harsh reality.]

[ Ren continues to look skeptical. ] I'm not an expert or anything. But I would've thought therapists were supposed to push your boundaries some.

[ He feels weird. Like a string that's been plucked, and is still vibrating. It's a relief to turn the conversation to something besides himself. ]

Typically, yes. They obviously aren't supposed to be too forceful, but they also aren't supposed to enable unhealthy coping mechanisms. My own therapist would surely offer Yoshizawa-san a compassionate approach, but one that nudged her toward making peace with her sister's death instead.

[And she has done Akechi so much good that, naturally, the bar is rather high in his book.]

I suspect Maruki's hindered by his desire to erase all the pain in the world. But pain cannot be erased. It can fade, but it is a part of life.

[ Ren wrinkles his nose. ] Even if he's not doing any brainwashing, he still sounds shady as fuck, dude. Erasing all pain sounds like an anime villain motive.

Edited 2023-08-31 01:27 (UTC)

Oh, it does. It's just flat out unrealistic, and it feels as though he's letting his own personal feelings impede on his ability to do his job.

[Nonetheless, he does an irritated hand wave and blows a small puff of air.]

Yet his therapy seems to yield some modicum of results, as he came to Shujin with a "high recommendation." He's more pleasant than Kobayakawa or Kamoshida, but his naivety is nauseating.