personavelvetroomdr | [EVENT] Memory Tapes

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[EVENT] Memory Tapes

On the morning of November 21st, denizens in the Velvet Room will awake to a message on their phones or by their bedsides in an envelope. Perhaps even on their computer screens.

Greetings! If you've received this message, then you've been selected as a participant in a new activity to strengthen bonds within this community. In order to facilitate connections with your fellow residents, we advise you to watch this video. Watch it and return the tape to its rightful owner. If you lacked the means to watch VHS tapes before, we have provided you with the necessary equipment. Failure to do so may put your own memories at risk. Do not be selfish, lest you find yourself struggling to recall crucial moments of your life. You have no way of knowing which memories have been shared, so ask yourself if it is worth the risk to selfishly hoard another's secrets.

They will soon find a VHS tape, with a case that gives off a soft, blue glow to symbolize its importance. If they lack a TV or VCR, they will find one in their living space.

What they do is up to them, but they should heed the warning, if they value their own memories.

[For links to characters' memories, please see this post in the OOC comm. Have fun!]

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I don't know. Whatever works best for you.

[...]

Sorry. I got two tapes, and they were... a lot.

I can imagine. Jazz Jin, if you know where that is? Been a while since I've been.

I know where it is. I actually spend a lot of time in Kichijoji, so...

[Ugh. She shouldn't be this mopey...]

Anyway, I'll be there.

[And after sending the message, she makes her way there, eager to do something to keep her mind off that other tape.]

Edited 2024-12-18 01:46 (UTC)

Well, the great thing about his progression with magic was that he could be wherever he wanted on short notice. So he gave himself some time to get ready, and then simply... stepped through.

Jazz Jin was rarely busy, save on nights with live music, but the atmosphere today was quiet, which was a draw all its own. Phoenix selected a table, and glanced at the drinks menu, just in case there was anything he wanted. Hmm.

He looked up, as she entered, and raised his hand in greeting. "... You look like you've been through it. I can imagine some fucked-up shit you might've seen in that, so... do you... need to vent?"

She hesitated at first, but slowly approached the table. "Well... your tape wasn't really a problem." She paused. "It explained a lot about our first meeting, and why you cared so much."

The yelling still wasn't pleasant, but he'd already apologized for that, so... Drawing a breath, she sank down in the open chair. "It's the other tape that was... difficult."

He could hazard a guess, given the local Black Mask population. "Difficult emotionally, or difficult as in violent?"

"A bit of both, to be honest." Weak laughter creeps out of her, but she doesn't smile.

He drew a sigh. "I'm not asking you to confirm or deny. But I think, for a lot of us... violence is all we've ever known. The only means of expressing agency, for the longest time. That doesn't make any of what's happened okay, but given the right opportunity... people can change."

"It was... one of the other Yoshizawas, killing her sister's Shadow in Mementos." Her fingers idly tap on the tabletop. It was a lot. It still is a lot. The kind of image you can't just shake off.

"Christ on a stick."

"Uh. Yeah, I can imagine how that would be incredibly hard to watch. Probably the one I haven't met, yet." He hoped, sincerely, that it was an accident. The alternative wasn't easy to think about.

"I'm... sorry." What else was there to say?

"I don't think she understood what she was doing. Her sister's Shadow said some awful things. Things that would've cut deep for anyone to hear from a loved one..." She tries to slow her breathing, tries to ground herself. "I just don't understand why Igor-san would make us watch such personal memories..."

Edited (oops, typo) 2024-12-23 04:43 (UTC)

"If nothing else, in my experience it fosters a better understanding of the people you end up sharing with. Though... I don't know what the old man is thinking, handling it the way he's doing it."

He slid the tape across the table. "In any case, I'm curious what it is of mine you saw."

"Your Yoshizawa was very kind to your Shadow, even though he kept saying terrible things about himself. She seemed to understand you on a deeper level and was willing to look at that Shadow without fear..." She stares down at the table, blowing a soft sigh. "I know Shadows can be hostile. They can say terrible things. I can understand why the other Yoshizawa reacted poorly to what her sister's Shadow said, but to kill her..."

He breathed outwards, hearing that. "I... yeah. I was... going through a lot. I've told others this story, but- Goro Akechi... died, in my timeline. To Shido, he was a useful tool, an effective killer, and a disposable asset. His last action was trying to shield the Phantoms from harm, in spite of everything- and then, when our Maruki inherited a power he never should have... possibly because of his bond with our Ren- he created me."

It wasn't a happy story, but he'd recounted it so often now the sting had faded. "What he was doing wasn't... good. Sumire... lost her sister in a terrible accident, for which she blamed herself. She wished that she had died, and her sister had lived. So he... made her believe she was her sister. That she was Kasumi. He could... have helped her heal. But instead he decided it was more convenient to erase a girl who was, despite her protestations to the contrary, kind, and talented, and intelligent, with dreams and a personality of her own- in favor of her more confident and popular twin. And she wasn't the only one. He tried doing it to the Phantoms. He tried doing it to me, and I think the only thing that stopped him was how badly Ren wanted me to be allowed to be... me. He wanted to do that to the entire world. Just... erase their pain."

"We faced him. We stopped him. Ren nearly didn't, once... Maruki revealed to us both that if he failed, if his hold on the cognitive world was released- I would vanish. I would die. We argued about it. But in the end, he accepted that whatever happiness I would have on the other side, if we took that deal- it wouldn't be me, experiencing it. I fought Maruki, fully expecting to die. And I very much did. I felt myself unravel as the Palace collapsed- but then... I woke up. In a place not unlike this one. People from many worlds and many timelines had also been dragged there, all with the knowledge that this- was just a shared dream. In the end, they would wake up, and as pleasant as it was, it would eventually fade. I didn't... take it well. I don't think I would've held it together, if... Ren and Sumire hadn't made it there with me, somehow."

"I believed... that my life could end at any moment. I would awaken, or Ren would, and I would cease to be. I was convinced that my life was completely meaningless. That Shadow was... everything I tried to repress, because it was easier to pretend that I didn't care. That that... wasn't hurting me. My emotions, my attachments, my... growing realization that I had never, once, been allowed to be 'me'. Everything about me was manufactured, shaped by somebody else. I didn't even have a way of knowing for sure whether anything I felt or remembered actually happened. Whether any of it was real. Sumire..."

He sighed quietly, ran his fingers through his hair. "Sumire never hesitated. She knew I was... a complicated person to like. Knew I was dangerous and unstable, but she... took my hand. She wanted to be my friend, in spite of everything. Wanted to help me through my- identity crisis, because she knew what it was like, to not know who you are, to doubt the accuracy of your own senses and memory. She was my friend. One of the most incredible people I've ever met, and... I loved her. Dearly. Platonically, I mean- I am... very sure now, that I'm not interested in women- but I wish I'd told her that, honestly."

To her credit, Midnight tries to listen, she really does, but certain details make her wince, gripping her temple. Words become static. Names switch positions. Her brow tightens as she tries to make sense of it. He's... trying to say something about Maruki.

Some of it registers. The things about his existence, about his worries...

"...It's good that she was able to accept you. That all sounds so difficult to bear. Not knowing who you are, how much is real..."

Gah! This is... She shuts her eyes, takes a breath.

"But... I just don't see what's so wrong about a world without pain. I know Dr. Maruki would try his best to make it safe for everyone. He'd do everything he could to make everyone's dreams come true."

"I think, ultimately, the issue is... what is it you give up, when you remove that? Peoples' values conflict. There's innately going to be situations where some people are going to be more content than others. In order to resolve that... Maruki, fundamentally, has to change people, with or without their consent. He has to wipe clean whoever they were, and replace them with a version of themselves that's less... complicated. It's not that Maruki, specifically, shouldn't have that power. It's that nobody should. The ability to enforce that, on the broad scale, is... terrifying."

He looked up to meet her eyes. "I saw your Awakening, Kasumi. It was... eye-opening. I'm not confident that what you remember is how it happened, based on... the way that memory played out. Jumping around, like a badly-cut film. Segments that felt... inserted. I don't know."

"You mean like Sparrow-san..." It's not lost on her how he's been affected, for better and for worse. It's... complicated, she knows. She feels for him, truly.

But her awakening...?

"But that doesn't make sense. I remember my awakening so clearly."

"Would it help you, do you think, if we watched it together?"

"Well... I suppose it wouldn't hurt. And at least it'd be better than that other tape." She shudders at that memory, still haunting her.

This was... unpleasant. But... maybe it would help, in the long run.

He turned towards the television, searching for a moment- ah. "Here. Conveniently-located VCR, good news."

On with the tv, in with the tape. "I... hope you'll be able to see what I mean, actually, come to think of it. It feels- off."

"I guess I'll find out soon enough..."

But as the tape starts playing, she doesn't see anything out of the ordinary. The cuts between clips are too garbled for her to make sense of, and she leans forward and squints, trying to parse it. "...I don't understand. Some of this looks normal, but I can't make sense out of the rest of it. It's all distorted."

"... Distorted how? Can you describe what it is you're seeing?"

"It's a lot of static and hissing between what looks like my awakening." Exactly the way she remembers it, even. So why the discrepancies? What does it mean?

"I see. That's what I'm seeing, as well, but..." He sighed. "It doesn't fit the pattern of any awakening I've ever witnessed. Removing that mask has never once been easy. Every time, for that first time- it's agony. You're ripping away a facade you've used for so long that it's become a part of yourself, metaphorically welded to your skin. It takes ages to even work up the nerve to pull at it, once it appears, let alone muster the strength to pull it free. But here... it's almost effortless. It doesn't make sense."

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midnightmaiden - 2025-02-03 17:51 (UTC) - Expand

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