A little game to play [OPEN] [NETWORK]

[angel_of_mercy]

 This is something the Futaba of my world came up with, before I became an Angel; Look up the word 'Florida Man' plus the date of your birthday, and see what comes up.

I've given to learn that 'Florida Man' became a subject of fascination for many Children of God, on account of the...rather chaotic reasons they get arrested. Gogo's Birthday is June 2nd, like most Akechis, but for me, the date of my ascension is a birth date all it's own. So, if I were to have a birthday, it'd be Christmas Eve. The day Yaldabaoth changed me forever...

One of the first things that came up for this was a man being arrested for crashing his car. Sounds completely ordinary, right? Seems like they found him on a construction site, making angel shapes in the dirt.

...This feels like an intentional joke on me by the Universe...

Comments

[willowandoak]

"a Florida man tried to cross the ocean in a hamster wheel."

king shit

[lakebrat]

You would, too.

And it would be a real ocean, not something piddly like the Atlantic.

[willowandoak]

this is def a compliment so thx!!

[lakebrat]

My confidence is well placed.

How far did he get, anyway?

[willowandoak]

not far but the arrest was hard bc he had a bomb in the hamster wheel???
also apparently it was his third try
what was he arrested for tho
is it against the law to cross the ocean in a giant hamster wheel
what law is that
is it an intl ocean law or w/e. countries all over the world getting together to outlaw floating hamster wheels

[lakebrat]

You may find this hard to believe, but I'm assured the police sometimes arrest people for their own protection.

[Yes, Goro will believe it when he sees it, too.]

And for having bombs. Thoroughly unreasonable, if you ask me.

[willowandoak]

no they fucking dont

[ Then the second text comes in. ]

ok for bombs ye they do that

[lakebrat]

Entirely uncalled for.

Mine, in case you're interested, was charged with slashing 27 tyres.

[willowandoak]

why 27
did they get him before he could get hte last tire on the last car

[lakebrat]

Looks like it was all a bit haphazard. Allegedly he blamed the government.

[Which, when you come to think of it....]

To be fair, we don't *know* he's wrong.

[willowandoak]

mood

[lakebrat]

[They understand each other.]

To be honest, I'm hurt you can't see me slashing people's tyres. I'm sure plenty of them have it coming. Government assistance or not.

[willowandoak]

its not that
u would slash them all u wouldnt half ass it
so like unless u got a trike or a unicycle or smth it would never be 27 tires

[lakebrat]

I'd never slash someone's unicycle tyre. You have to have *some* standards.

And was that a compliment?

[angel_of_mercy]

I wonder if something is in the water for these Children of God...

[willowandoak]

maybe
maybe thats why he didnt take a real boat. closer to the poisoned water

[ Does she always call people that? Fuck. ]

[angel_of_mercy]

Quite a glib response, if I do say so myself. I appreciate it, however.

That said, I don't think we've been introduced. Who are you?

[willowandoak]

im ren
if u read the board u saw me listed as drake
sorry i didnt say hi when u showed up i was busy with smth

[angel_of_mercy]

It is a pleasure to speak with you, Drake.

I'm Zadkiel, Angel of Mercy and Forgiveness. But I was also once the Daughter of Eve known as Gogo Akechi. Feel free to refer to me as the former, as I'm aware of another version of me around here. But both names are true of me.

And don't feel bad about that. I also had my own things to deal with here, as well.

[willowandoak]

zadkiel then
kinda long tbh
zad?

[angel_of_mercy]

Zad...

You know what, I think I like that. My angelic name is terribly formal, after all~

I do have rather...complicated feelings about my name. It, like my divinity and purview, was forced unto me by a god who thought it was...amusing.

[willowandoak]

ya i didnt want to say it but i dont rly think mercy and forgiveness when i think of akechis

[externalcombustion]

People in other US states are just as weird (source: lived in New York until I was 9). Florida's just the one that makes the police blotter public record more or less immediately.

[angel_of_mercy]

The Children of God there seem to take this reputation in stride, for what it's worth. I hear they even have an event called the Florida Man Games. Challenges are based on real news articles.

[externalcombustion]

...Yeah, that sounds like typical Florida.